hokey pete!

alrighty, well seein' as it's been 17 days since i posted something.... here goes nothing!

my dad and sister finally came home! they were gone entirely too long! also, the pregnant one should be moving out her crap soon! thank goodness! and everything else is about the same. i have been practicing cooking and other such "housely" duties... it's fun. ish. kinda. eh.

the past while at work has been wretched! the nights drag on and then *bam* we get an admit at the most inconvenient time! and then i'm stuck doing the nurses work! grr. double grr. anywho, i recently joined the damn twitter bandwagon. i feel like such a goon. but it actually is pretty enticing darn it all!!!!!

thought of the day....

just because you are hot does not make you attractive.


ie. yesterday, today, and pry tomorrow one of the patients was quite "easy on the eyes" if you catch my drift.... also, i won't complain about having to get his vitals. you see, he had these massive oh so delicious arms that were perfectly accentuated by his kick a$$ tats... so i'm sure you can only imagine my dilemma.... here i am acting like a bumbling fool at this patient. well, the second day he had to walk. and you see, patients, for the most part, shouldn't walk "unsupervised" so we went for a stroll around the surgical track. as we were walking he felt the need to inform me of his *importance* as the boss which, quite frankly, does not impress me. since i made this abundantly clear by crossing my arms and nodding at his meaningless remarks, he continued by name dropping. here is the best part! dan the laptop man as if i give a flying you know what about him or the people who he claims work for him. bleh. *puke* not impressed. still not giving him the reaction the rest of the women who work on our floor were giving him, he continued by explaining to me that he "can sell the whole damn store in one day".... whoopie doo.

anywho, the moral of this story is if someone is physically attractive, request that they not speak. it will only ruin your dreams....

wow the internet....

i know i know... i just posted. but i went to my blog to ensure it had all turned out alright. turns out, this genius of a site has underlined and hyperlinked the word *erection* and if you click on it you can go to an online pharmacy and purchase meds for ED... interesante!

...wonder if it would work for any good meds *wink wink*

feelin caca...

alrighty.... i am sick of feeling like poo. i am not ill too often so when i am i can handle it. however, when i do come down with something, it is generally an upper respiratory issue. you know, the common cold. not so yesterday and today. i haven't felt this way in years. no bueno! i was unable to sleep yesterday which means i was no fun at work. i was even less useful. they sent me home @ 430... that's how lame-o i was.

so here i sit. unable to do anything. can't sleep cuz i gotta skeedaddle into the potty. can't eat. it won't stay put. grr. i have had sprite and saltines. i know i am whining and i am sorry...

surprisingly, while i was "working" i got lots of reading done! i am super into reading strangers' blogs. does that make me a creep??? i don't even care! i read this one woman's account of labor and have never chuckled to myself like that...
then i read another woman's heartfelt desire to be a mom. it's funny cuz they were nothing alike but definitely got me thinking about the whole situation. especially cuz i have been battling my uterus as of late. [i'm sure you don't want to know details...] i officially am sick of gynos, being *probed* or shall i say violated! i am sick of hurting and feeling sick. ugh. sick of it all! and i know i know, everyone has troubles. it's just funny how one such trouble can make you question everything you thought you wanted....

also, i would like to comment on patients. i have never been one so i really don't know what it's like. but i can tell you that taking care of patients who are my age or so is the weirdest thing i've ever done. i can't even tell you how strange it is to walk in on a man with a purple pe pe or to have some lady, legs up, ask me "if that is normal".... surely you can only imagine!
up to this point, my strangest patient inquiry was "will a catheter hurt when i have an erection in the morning? i have one every morning. it's healthy to have an erection every morning." well congrats to you sir. i don't know the answer to your question i will get the nurse. i am so grateful that i am able to give that answer regularly, particularly when i am uncomfortable. so, nurses, thank you for being the suckers who have to have the full on conversations about healthy morning erections.

however, i would also like to thank the family members who provide more entertainment for myself, my family, and my friends. thank you for your brazen disregard for clothing while in bed with your wife. the one who just got back from having her parts removed. and for asking when the soonest you can resume your "nookie sessions".... do i look like the doctor?!? no. don't ask. i may know the question but that doesn't mean i actually want to have this conversation with you.

intro....

okie dokie friends. just so you know.... i feel like giving my thoughts and opinions on life.

here is my frustration of the day:
if i clean the kitchen, please do not leave you dishes in the sink and mookie pan full of water. that is gross. i don't clean for fun. so let's keep it clean. thank you.